October 10, 2025
Let’s face it, life already feels like a horror movie most days. The soundtrack is just a mix of a lunatic holding the keys to the nuclear football, kids arguing over who touched whose cup, and your phone buzzing with yet another “urgent” notification. So if I’m going to be trapped in a fictional horror movie, I want one with a plot that gives me at least a fighting chance.
My first thought is Alien. It’s terrifying, sure, but at least there’s a clear mission: survive the alien. There’s no confusion about what’s going on. You’re not left wondering if the house is haunted or if you’re just bad at picking real estate. You know what the problem is: a horrifying creature wants to eat you. Simple.
But then I think about Hitchcock. His films have that slow, creeping dread, the kind where you know something awful is about to happen, but no one believes you because you’re the only one who saw it. At least in Alien, people die quickly. In Hitchcock movies, you have to live with suspense, suspicion, and lots of screaming violins.
What fascinates me about this question is how it exposes your fear personality. Some people pick The Shining because they think they’d outsmart the madness. Others go for Scream because they think they’d survive by following the “rules.” Me? I know better. I’d trip over something in the first ten minutes. But I’d still make sure my final line was funny.
Maybe that’s the point, no matter what horror movie we end up in, we can still decide what kind of character we want to be. The brave one. The funny one. The one who makes it to the sequel.
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So… if you got sucked into a fictional horror movie, what movie would you choose?
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